Sometimes it feels like life throws us a curveball. And, often it isn’t much fun!
It’s as simple as it sounds. Ask yourself the question “what’s good about this?” when you feel challenged.
It’s a lot like the old “silver lining” strategy. When you keep looking, there is gold inside every “problem” or “challenge” or unpleasantness. And, yes, sometimes you have to look really hard and dig really deep to find it.
It takes a different perspective. When something feels difficult, it is unusual to look for the bright side, the silver lining, the good. And, I can pretty much guarantee you that most of the people around you are happier helping you complain about it than helping you look for the good. It might be a bit of a lonely activity!
By the way, if it feels lonely, you do have help! Give me a call or email or find a friend that’s positive and upbeat and ask for help.
Why go through the trouble of finding the good?
1. Better Health: your emotional state drives your biochemistry. In basic terms, bad mood = bad chemistry and good mood = good chemistry. Bad chemistry impacts all the way down to your DNA and the future cells to be born. Do you want your future body cells born with bad or good vibes?
2. Better Future: what you focus on determines what you get more of. Your brain only shows you what you train it to show you. Focusing on the “downer” news trains your brain to show you “downer” aspects of life. When you’re ready for a fabulous life, begin looking for the good in everything. That way, you train your brain to show you the fabulous aspects of life. It’s a whole lot more fun!
3. Better Now: what you choose to think about determines the amount of happiness you feel right now. You can choose to think unhappy or happy thoughts. Music may say it best… Don’t worry; Be happy! or Happy! (clap along if you feel it)
4. Better Solutions: asking the question turns on creativity. Asking yourself, and others, to find the good in something turns on the brain’s creativity. I can guarantee you that you are going to be able to find solutions to a situation when you start asking useful questions. Staying focused on the “bad” side of something is a surefire way to stop creative thinking.
OK, so I think you get my point!
This week, I challenge you to find a situation that seems pure “bad” (or frustrating or depressing, etc.). Then, start asking yourself the question “what’s good about this?”. If you’ve been focusing and obsessing on the bad side of it, it may take a while for your brain to believe that you really want that answer. Once you’ve asked the question long enough, you are likely to find new perspectives showing up for you. Let your inner being help you answer the question.
Besides letting your inner being answer, there is also value in getting a pen and paper and setting a timer for 15 minutes. Write the question at the top of your paper and for 15 minutes write down everything you can think of that’s good about it.